Another crusade

Ok, so I haven't posted for a while. To be honest I have been in a slump, and for you that truly know me you know that that is not a common thing. My thoughts and spirit have been sad lately and I can only attribute that to my lack at working on it. Yesterday though I had such a great day at church that it throughly replenished me. First all the songs during Sacrament were ones that I like, lately they have been those obscure ones that no one knows, Praise to the man and Joseph Smiths first Prayer are some of my favorites. Then I really enjoyed the talks and enjoyed the letter from the 1st Presidency. I then got to go to primary and teach CTR 7, Jackson's class. I did all that by myself because like you all know Jason works every other weekend. Church has almost always been my escape from my stresses but going by myself this often has worn on my spirit. I of course will be the first to admit that I would never use him not being there with me as an excuse as to my own spirituality because I believe with all that is in me that you chose that by yourself and cannot allow someone else to have the power to make or take that away from you. With all that said I truly appreciate and realize my sincere joy at having my husband there with us. I also opened July's issue of the Ensign and must be the first to report that it is truly an amazing issue. Amazing because each article deals with something that someone close to me is dealing with. All I can say is read it and you'll not be disappointed it is very uplifting. So I finally did it I canceled our cable today. So tomorrow we will have NO CHANNELS. While i have done this once long ago this will truly be interesting, difficult and exciting all at once. Exciting, you might be wondering? Well it is truly amazing how inventive and creative a family can become when there is nothing on, literally though. My hope is that our family will enjoy quality time together and not count sitting and watching the same show together as that. i hope that more of you will take the plunge, you will suffer for the first few weeks but after that you will be blown away at the amount of time it has freed up for you, not to mention the money it frees up. Any how this is one of my attempts to refocus our families goals and save us some money. I just get in a rut sometimes spiritually and the best way out for me is to strive extra hard to do as much as possible that is right. I guess I've always felt that if I am in great need to have the Lord's blessings that I better live up to my part of the bargain. However you want to look at it fortunately or unfortunately I am always relying on him to help me with many things in my life and most of the time he has helped me when there was no way I could do it alone. My life seems so busy right now that I truly do need the temptation of TV removed from me. Don't think that I've completely lost my mind we can still watch some shows on the computer which will make weekends fun and cheap. Plus this will free me up to Blog!

So sings my soul

Please turn your speakers on and get to know and understand what makes me me. These are a list of some of my favorite 30 songs. I probably missed some but these are the ones that make my soul almost jump out of my skin. I picked most because they pull so much emotion from me and have so much meaning to me. Yes, I love me some pumpkins! I am probably the most eclectic person when it comes to music other than Jason. Almost all the songs Jason and I love together. We both are obsessed with music so it is not a big surprise that all of our kids have such a love for it too. You should see them all sing some of these songs together. They memorize songs so quick it always shocks me. I swear I should take them on the road! Music has always been my escape and has always brought me sanity. Even as a child I would retreat and sing to myself for fun, though it was always more fun to sing constantly and annoy everyone within earshot. I now love to sing with my family and I love that they love to have me sing. It truly means the world to me because no matter the struggles that this life brings music has always made me feel the spirit instantly. So please go through my list and see if you know them or if you remember when we loved them together. If not consider yourself enlightened!

Just rambling

I have been so busy lately that I have been neglecting my blogging. These darn kids are so demanding of my time, don't they understand that I'm trying to have some time by myself:) Ha Ha!My blogs have been perhaps too serious lately but i cannot help myself when I sit to write I become so reflective and turn all church ladyish. Hopefully I haven't turned to many people away due to my preaching. It can be just so therapeutic to ramble on. I went garage selling yesterday and today. I love to garage sale, dang these gas prices. My sister and I are going to share a bike trailer that i bought today. I was trying to find a high chair. i guess I'll have to turn to craigslist for that one. My baby is screaming so I'll post more later about my undying love for garage sales

endure to the end

I'm feeling very reflective today on ones ability to control ones life. I was at the park today with some friends from church and we began discussing challenges we have or are facing. All of us have husbands that are in school or are looking for work. It actually struck me as odd that we all had so much in common. Even though we had individual struggles we all had the same ultimate one which is it can be hard being the wife and supporting your spouse as they find there way in this life. There is a fine line we have to walk to gently guide them and be supportive while they are going to school or looking for work. If we say too much we are being nagging or controlling and if we don't say enough then we are not being supportive. I am by no means saying that a man's role is easy either, common they have to put up with our hormones, and they have to be the one that is suppose to support the family. I guess right now I find it humbling that no matter how different our lives are there are many things that most LDS women have in common. I will hopefully never know how hard it is to have the pressure of having to do well in school so I can get a job to support my family. But like wise our husbands will never know how much we have to do to hold it altogether so that we add no more pressure to them. Sometimes I forget that while I'm waiting for this period to be over ,so that we can truly get on with our life, I realize that our life was really going all along. If you miss the opportunities to cling to one another while things are tough you will never really realize how great things are when things are easy. Being a wife can be even more challenging when the end destination is the same but the road you travel to get there on is different. It can be tough to decide whether you should give up your road, especially when you know it's the right one:) or nag them over to yours, it doesn't matter how you say it they will take it as nagging. Somehow all marriages come to these roads and while some women are content to never budge from there roads it really isn't any worse then those that never acknowledge there is any other roads but there husbands. Hopefully our husbands married us for our brains and not just our perfect bodies, otherwise they are in for a surprise to see what's left after 5 babies! We just have to be better about our approach It can just be so tough to sit and watch there choices affect our lives even when they make the right ones. I am lucky my husband values my opinion, for the most part anyway as you might have noticed I have an overabundance of them, He trust me and I trust him that no matter what road we choose to walk down, we do it together. We can only truly control a few things in this life and one of them is our attitude no matter the situation we can chose to be happy and positive. The most life changing book I have ever read , other than scriptures, was Dr. Phil's Life Strategies. I wish that everyone could read it. I recommend it to everyone who has ever struggled, will ever struggled or has ever been born! We all have similar struggles we couldn't all be alone otherwise during the atonement Jesus would have been there forever enduring each individual unique pain we each would have, he'd still be in there, so with each new struggle we can take comfort that even when we don't know anyone personally with the same struggles there have been many and are many that have endured this and isn't it always amazing how quickly the struggles are forgotten once they're over

Enjoying Life

First off my sweet Addalyn rolled over on Fathers Day for the first time, while I love that she is growing up I hate that she is growing up. she rolled to get a my little pony. I snapped this pic right after she rolled. She was not much happier after she rolled because she then was stuck. Jason had to work on fathers day so we celebrated mainly yesterday. We made him breakfast then he played on the computer with the kids with the new games he got to play with them. We then planted our garden, which you have never seen kids more excited to do. After that we BBQ and went to the park( on the other side of our backyard) to play croquet. After some really awesome fits by Jackson, he absolutely hates to not do well or have people"beat" him, we went inside and got ready for the end of the year LDS Homeschool potluck. After getting lost for 40 minutes we arrived ate, played, talked and left. We then went and filled up at Costco for $4.13, which by the way is about 15 cents cheaper than the rest of the stations. These gas prices are truly going to change all of our lives. After 9/11 I remember thinking that our world has forever been changed and that there are things I will probably never do now, like go back and take my family with me to Europe. Those bombings altered my perception on my families safety here and everywhere. In some ways though it made me realize that truly the time is at hand, but with gas prices and food prices skyrocketing I realize that we are again that much closer to the end. I'm in no means saying that it will happen tomorrow only that look how much has happened in the last 7 years. For me I see everything as signs to get myself and my family prepared. We are buying a lot of food storage supplies this week and hopefully will be getting our water barrels soon. I found this out of a talk by Dallin H. Oaks and it really made me stop and think.

“But know this, that if the goodman of the house had known in what watch the thief would come, he would have watched, and would not have suffered his house to be broken up” (Matt. 24:42–43). “But would have been ready” (JS—M 1:47).

“Therefore be ye also ready: for in such an hour as ye think not the Son of man cometh” (Matt. 24:44; see also D&C 51:20).

What if the day of His coming were tomorrow? If we knew that we would meet the Lord tomorrow—through our premature death or through His unexpected coming—what would we do today? What confessions would we make? What practices would we discontinue? What accounts would we settle? What forgivenesses would we extend? What testimonies would we bear?

If we would do those things then, why not now? Why not seek peace while peace can be obtained? If our lamps of preparation are drawn down, let us start immediately to replenish them.

We need to make both temporal and spiritual preparation for the events prophesied at the time of the Second Coming. And the preparation most likely to be neglected is the one less visible and more difficult—the spiritual. A 72-hour kit of temporal supplies may prove valuable for earthly challenges, but, as the foolish virgins learned to their sorrow, a 24-hour kit of spiritual preparation is of greater and more enduring value.

Homeschool'in

Ya, ya, I know you've all heard me go off about my homeschooling a million times but today I got to go with my sis in law Becky to a big homeschooling fair up near Seattle and had such an amazing and overwhelming time. For anyone that has concerns about not knowing how or what they'd use to homeschool because they think public schools are the only ones with access to good educational stuff just needs to step foot at a fair like this, you can get a good taste online also, to realize that public school kids are truly being short changed. No matter how your child learns there is several options of curriculum for your child , it is just awesome. No matter your views on the subject of homeschooling isn't there a comfort in knowing that if your neighborhood school doesn't fit your child or your child doesn't fit that school you have still an awesome option all hope is not lost. For me homeschooling showed me the path in which I was meant to parent. I do not look down on those that don't but you know how when something changes your life and you feel very strong about it it's hard to not want everyone around you to join in. I just hope that everyone at least has an opened mind to the option. If nothing else all moms should think of themselves as homeschooling at least in the beginning of their kids lives the only difference is some get to be the captains while others chose to copilot. It's just hard to turn that job over to someone that does not have the same love and devotion to my child that I do. That said I had a great time and we took my mom's Prius so we really saved on gas. It has been sunny for two days it almost is tricking me that it is June!

Visiting Teaching

I've been wanting to repost but time has been in short supply lately. I went VT the other day and it was my turn to teach the lesson. I was a little disappointed when I first looked up the lesson, still haven't received my Ensign this month, it was on, for those of you who have yet to read it:), pre-mortal life. Yet when I actually read it and pondered it I couldn't believe how perfect it was for me. The part that stuck out the most was the quote from President Kimball which said how sad and depressing our lives would be if this was IT, if this life was all we had to look forward to. How true that is, I think sometimes we all get caught up in our everyday life and forget that this is a prerequisite for something even greater. The other part that stuck out was that we had to all be on an equal footing here so the veil was placed over our eyes. Yet I truly think that although our visual memories are gone our spiritual memories are not and there are different times within our lives when we can feel and relive those memories for example when we feel the spirit and more easily noticed is at the birth of your child. The love felt can only give us a glimpse at the love that was experienced by our spirit before. I hadn't intend to go off on a sermon again but I really did enjoy feeling new insight with this lesson so I thought if nothing else would motivate others to either read the ensign, do their VT or conclude that I'm a religious fanatic.
We went to three of our sisters but only saw two the third I had to sit in the car and try to take care of the baby so my companion went to the door which I felt bad about because I knew she was nervous because we'd never met this person before, but she did it and when she came back from the door, we were just dropping off cookies and a letter, she was laughing because I guess the lady wasn't there but a really, lets say very large man, opened the door with nothing more than a blanket around him, she quickly explained who she was and that she would call the lady later to explain who we were. We laughed all the way to our next appointment. It is true that sometimes VT can be an interesting experience. Here is a link that I found on a fun family to do list http://www.angelfire.com/md2/moodyfamily/100things.html just copy and paste it and it will get you there. Addalyn has been sick the last few days and I'm half way out of my mind. and hopefully today we will finally see some signs of summer it should be 70 degrees! I keep joking that we've skipped summer and gone backwards to winter but maybe I can stop. Jason starts school next week. I'm not sure I'm mentally prepared yet but maybe that's a good sign sometimes I am more ready when I'm out of my right mind. By the way the pic is of us having milkshakes and playing games. It is amazing how pictures can make things look so CALM and loving.

Oh, to be young

Today there was a stake Activities Day program and being that I am a leader in it I got to go and spend the day with Payten and my niece Addisen. Thanks a lot Jenell for watching my other kids while Jason worked. It was sweet and cute and I believe each girl had fun learning about being a princess and making cute crafts. The funniest thing was when a 58 yr old women who was giving an etiquette and modest dress talk explained to the girls what T.H.O is, for you that never learned that name think what happens when a girl gets cold(and no she didn't use that term) it was so hard for me not to burst out with the giggles because everyone looked so horrified, she also told them that they should never wear a thong they just gave you a wedging all day long, Payten was so confused!But really the highlight was when she pushed her finger in between her breast and told the girls if the shirt bounced out your shirt was too tight and demonstrated a few times. Really she did a good job but it truly was amusing watching these little girls watch her. I really like the 8-11 year olds they are so innocent still.That is why I posted Payten's baptism pic from a year ago because she still looks that innocent. I can seriously sometimes close my eyes and can almost feel like I'm young again. What is the thing you miss most from those days? I miss truly having an imagination, I swear everything we played seemed so real. I also missed the way it felt to be done with school for the year and how exciting summer felt for no other reason than because it was summer, I know many of you are thinking that I'm not giving that to my kids but you know I could seriously digress and go off defending my my position on that. My parents always made sure we did some fun things every summer as a family, from camping ,or the beach or a serious trip like Disneyland we always had fun together, of course that was my perspective.
It's funny how stressful everything becomes when your an adult but as kids you only remember it being a good time. That is something I try to remind myself every time I really don't want to take my kids somewhere. It can be so hard remembering that this is their childhood and it really does mean that we have to as parents remove our stress from it. I'm going to make a list of everything and every experience I want my kids to have while they're young like a childhood to do list, then I will feel pressure to check it off, I love checking things off! It won't include only big things it will also be things like have a lemonade stand, watch for shooting stars and let me make your face up like a clown(you have to be my little bro or sis to get that one!) I want so much for my kids but sometimes my own laziness just gets the better of me, like letting them make big forts with all the blankets, it just can be so much extra work sometimes. This next week I am going to try canceling cable, yes again. It is amazing how something so simple can change your life. That said we'll still watch things online but that way we control when we watch certain things. Jason is not completely on board for my latest tirade about our, ok mainly his, TV watching. But he will be starting school again in two weeks so in away I'm doing him a big favor.
Well I'm going to start my list and I'll probably post it when I'm done, I'm curious what other people would put down on their list so please tell me a couple things that your list would include. I think I'll even involve my kids, a little I'm not sure I want to include all the big ideas that they might come up with!

One day at a time

First, I want to say how truly excited I was to hear from my friends I met while in North Carolina I will always feel a connection there.
This weekend we went to my parents beach house in Seaside, OR. Jason's family went with us. It was a lot of fun. We are so blessed my parents have it and allow us to go there. My kids would live there if they could, and it would be big enough, it's 3000 sq ft!
I am so ready for summer, not that we have any big plans, and not that we ever stop schooling but I'm ready for it to be sunny and warm! Jason starts back to school the end of this month so part of me is dreading that but I am so ready for that part of our life to be done, so does he! We might actually have to take out a student loan for the first time which is a little scary due to the fact we've never done it before. We have also been considering looking into other states that will pay off your loans as a sign on bonus, I'm not sure if $10,000 is worth the cost of that sign on bonus, but Jason has the itch to move away again. Jason was so homesick when we lived in NC that all he wanted to do was get back to the North West but once we came back he realized how much he liked being away. Sure he missed our families but everyone has so much going on in their own lives we don't all get together like we used to. So lately he has been trying to get me to agree to moving again. when we bought this house we took everything out of the boxes we had had in boxes for the last 3 years and got rid of the boxes because we said we'd live here for at least three years, or until the market rebounds and are able to sell our house for a great deal more than we paid. Once he gets done with school I'm not sure what we'll do but as with my life up until now I just take each day as it comes because I'm sure the Lord has more than a few surprises for me in store.
Oh ya Addalyn has her two bottom teeth she is growing much too fast, literally, she's close to 20lbs!

The church lady

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I am still feeling kind of churchy and have been pondering lately how to better align ourselves with the iron rod. For me it has always been pretty easy to not DO stuff like for example; rated R movies, take out my more than one earing in each ear, word of wisdom issues, gambling, keeping sabbath day holy just to a few that I did not struggle with. But for me sometimes the DOING like; daily scripture study, FHE, visiting teaching and other task such as those have been more of my struggles. I know that everyone has different struggles but for me I have always thought about how much harder the early saints had it and how great their sacrifices were and how much was asked of them it just strikes me as trivial and silly that I'd be unwilling to not watch Rated R movies. I'm sorry if this strikes a nerve with those I love but come on it's a movie and if it is hard for you just think of the blessings that have been promised by following his commandments. I know that I come off self-righteous but I really don't mean to I just do feel strongly about that issue. I guess what I'm saying is I feel very blessed that I don't live back then because I can't imagine the strength that they must of had to defend the church with their lives and sit and watch their loved ones do the same and everything they were asked truly is more than I can comprehend. Is Satan so much stronger now that the temptations for evil are hidden in these seemly trivial commandments? I guess it would make sense just look at how he twists the TV, computer, magazines, fashion, politics, movies, and even songs in to something bad. I always thought that when I was an adult it would be easy to live and follow the gospel just due to the fact that I would have a more clear perspective and for the most part that is true but I do find it can be more exhausting due to the fact that others now rely on your example. Just think how much our simple acts like getting to church on time or being seen reading our scriptures affects our family. Truly the most powerful examples come when we think no one is looking. I always like to think that He knows our capabilities and understands our limits and I have to believe he never gives more than we can handle but often does push our limits but through it all he's willing to guide and help us with our "burdens". I suppose that I know so much of these things because the Lord has given me such a powerful testimony through the many test, that whether I've passed or failed, I have been given. Life truly is meant to be enjoyed not just endured but sometimes we can easily lose focus that we truly are here for such a short time and each of us can help write our "movie" script. Although there will always be surprises and a lot we have no control over we can control our actions and we do have control over our destiny and happiness. We often take paths that are much harder than they need to be and we all know those that seemed to be determined to make life harder than He intended it to be,teenager self comes to mind, but hopefully when this life is over we will see and feel how worthwhile it all was because to me everything I do or have to do will be so worth it if only I can be with my loved ones for eternity, how can anything be worth more than that?

A little churchy

We went to the beach this weekend but I'll post on that when I get the pics ready. Today in Relief Society we were discussing asking in faith. I have been pondering lately that when I ask Heavenly Father for help am I not showing faith if I continually pray for it? I think sometimes we all struggle with knowing if something is right and sometimes it is hard to differentiate between what we need and what we want. I have lived my whole life pleading for some of the same things; healthy family, certain family members and friends to feel of the spirit and return to church. I don't ask for these things as filler in my prayers but I have always taken other peoples fates and sometimes decisions on my shoulders. I can remember being 7yrs old and begging Heavenly Father to help my Brother please find his way back to church. I couldn't bear the thought of our eternal family not including him. Through the years my prayers have included more than a few of my siblings and I also gained enough insight to know that instead of finding their way back to church it is more help them to know of thy love. Recently though in RS a comment struck me , when asking for someone inactive to find the truth again, or how ever you word it, are we implying that Heavenly Father is not already trying to help them, is there anyone who wants that more than he does? I know that Alma prayed for Alma the younger so it doesn't mean we shouldn't still pray for them but that we need to remember with whom we are speaking with. The story from Elder Bednar fom Aprils conference is so great and truly moves me each time I hear it that I decided to post it and because it shows sometimes we have to remember we won't always receive the answers we want but his views of our lives are complete while we are near sighted.

Not My Will, but Thine, Be Done

Several years ago there was a young father who had been active in the Church as a boy but had chosen a different path during his teenage years. After serving in the military, he married a lovely girl, and soon children blessed their home.

One day without warning their little four-year-old daughter became critically ill and was hospitalized. In desperation and for the first time in many years, the father was found on his knees in prayer, asking that the life of his daughter be spared. Yet her condition worsened. Gradually, this father sensed that his little girl would not live, and slowly his prayers changed; he no longer prayed for healing but rather for understanding. “Let Thy will be done” was now the manner of his pleadings.

Soon his daughter was in a coma, and the father knew her hours on earth were few. Fortified with understanding, trust, and power beyond their own, the young parents prayed again, asking for the opportunity to hold her close once more while she was awake. The daughter’s eyes opened, and her frail arms reached out to her parents for one final embrace. And then she was gone. This father knew their prayers had been answered—a kind, compassionate Father in Heaven had comforted their hearts. God’s will had been done, and they had gained understanding. (Adapted from H. Burke Peterson, “Adversity and Prayer,” Ensign, Jan. 1974, 18.)

Discerning and accepting the will of God in our lives are fundamental elements of asking in faith in meaningful prayer. However, simply saying the words “Thy will be done” is not enough. Each of us needs God’s help in surrendering our will to Him.